When You're Snowed In....

I'm writing this from the frozen tundra that is St. Louis.  While some areas got hit fairly hard, Fenton (in particular) dodged the bullet.  Don't get me wrong, we got quite a bit of ice and sleet but on the snow end we ended up with only about 4 inches, where other areas had 12+.  Kind of a bummer considering the snowpocalypse that the meteorologists were predicting.  I have been stuck at home for the past two days and for what?! 4 inches of snow?!  Bah.

 I finally couldnt take the cabin fever anymore and ventured out for a Zumba class this afternoon.  Made it there safely and am SO glad I went.  I just started Zumba last week but am already hooked! I'm hoping along with my other crazy workouts, this will help me get to my final goal.  Have any of you ever taken Zumba, and if so, what were your results?

One bonus of being stuck indoors was being able to catch up on some movie watching and getting some extra reading done.  Have any of you seen "Burried" w/ Ryan Reynolds? WOW. Some kind of crazy but I definitely recommend it....even despite the fact that I have an (so I've been told) irrational fear of being burried alive.

I also saw "The Social Network" for the first time and was highly impressed.  What a crazy story behind the conception of Facebook.  Not only did I learn new things about Facebook and Napster, but also about Victoria's Secret.  The screen play was great and the acting was actually legit. (And...P.s. Justin Timberlake is in it... and, well, I got to have a girly crushing moment lol)  I highly recommend this one!

So on top of movie watching, fire having, game playing, puzzle solving, and DVR'ing, I also got in not 1 but 2 chapters of Crazy Love. I know I normally go into long descript over each chapter but for chapter 6 I have chosen just to interact with a few quotes and ask for your feedback on your reaction to the book thus far.

Chapter 6 is entitled "When You're In Love" and basically compares our actions in human love with our actions in spiritual love toward God. How do you act when you're in love?  Do those same actions transcend to your relationship with God?  Do you think about Him, talk about Him, and want to be with Him all the time? You should. And if you don't? Don't force it... here's why:

   - " It does no good to muster up more love for God, to will yourself to love Him more.  When loving Him becomes an obligation , one of many things we have to do, we end up focusing more on ourselves."

At no point in time did God ever demand that we love Him or oblige us to do so.  We have free will for a reason.  He created us with it and certainly hopes we will use it to love Him but He does not force our hands.  When our love comes from a heart motive of obligation then guess what, it's no good to Him.  Who wants someone to love them because the object of their affection feels forced to do so?  Not me. "I only love you because I have to", "I'm only with you because I'm afraid to be alone", "I'm only spending time with you because (so and so) told me I had to".  Doesnt feel so great does it?  Do we somehow think that God is exempt to feeling hurt at our forced time with Him and feigned love for Him? If we're created in His image, including our ability to experience emotions, then yes, God feels the same hurts that we do and our inability to love Him with our full hearts hurts the heart of God.  Think about that.

The great thing is, we're not condemned in our inability to love correctly.  We're are flawed beings who are incapable of doing anything perfectly, including loving anyone.  But, Mr. Chan points this out " The fact is, I need God to help me love God."  He IS love, so who better to help us give love than the author of it.  There's no shame in asking God to make us better lovers of Him.  He wants us to love Him and I believe, that if we come to Him with humble and expectant hearts, that He will reveal to us the ways in which we can love Him better.  There's hope!

Chan points out that our pursuit of loving God is directly opposed to our pursuit of sin.  If we are intensely invested in our pursuit of loving God, our focus will be on that and not on giving into the sins of the flesh. Makes sense right?  It's all a matter of focus, perspective, and desire.  If your focus is the world, the world will drive you.  If you perceive that all you have to live for is you, yourself, and you, you will dwell in a self centered existence.  If you desire to attain the love of those who are earth bound, and give no thought to loving the Divine, you will inevitably live in a state of constent dissapointment.  But focus on Christ and His desires will drive you.  Perceive that we are only visitors here on earth, and you will live as each day is your last to spread the message of the gospel.  Desire to, with His help, love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind and your inate human desire to live in sin with be derailed. Got that?



To conclude:

 I think this really sums it all up.... I want to fall in love with YOU.

Blessings,

Ash

What's in your ziplock bag?

Have you ever taken a moment to consider what you're giving to God.  Your life, and everything in it, is a gift from God and what you do with that life is your gift back to Him.  Do you go to church every Sunday and just sort of go through the motions of singing when everyone else sings, bow in prayer when instructed, or partake of a matza cracker and Welches grap juice when the tray is passed?  What about throughout the week, do you still serve Him outside of the 4 walls of the church, and if so, what does that servitude look like? 

In chapter 5 of Crazy Love Mr. Chan challenges readers to consider what kind of love they are giving to the One who IS love. He begins by ruffling a few feathers by presenting His view that lukewarm Christians, Christians who half heartedly serve God but also half heartedly serve the world, are not Christians at all.  You might find this view to be fairly presumptuous, being that ultimately God will judge the lives of both believers and unbeliever and therefor it is not our job, however before you can jump on the train traveling down the "Offensive Line", He gives thorough scriptural evidence of the Lord's disgust for the lukewarm variety "Christian".  The Scriptures warn of trying to serve two masters, of having no God's before the One God, of our God being a jealous God, of God spitting out the lukewarm....need I go on?  Mr. Chan actually dissects the passage on "spitting out" and reveals that the greek word for spitting isnt merely a popcorn kernal pytalise but rather a "gaging, hurling, or wretching."  Are you ok with being "hurled" out of God's mouth?  Take time to read through the Gospels and you will most likely come to the same conclusion that he did: "My conclusion? Jesus' call to commitment is clear: He wants all or nothing. The thought of a person calling himself a "Christian" without following Christ is absurd."  Following Christ = following all that God has commanded...not just a few things...all things.






We shouldnt desire to follow Christ or to follow His commands out of fear for our salvation.  God doesnt ask us to serve Him out of guilt or fear.  He wants us to LOVE Him and therefore follow His commands out of that love.
                   - "God doesnt just want us to have good theology; He wants us to know and love Him."


So here comes the doozie of a look at the everyday Christian's approach to giving to God:

    - "It's easy to fill ourselves up with other things and then give God whatever is left.  Hosea 13:6 says, 'When I fed them, they were satisfied; when they were satisfied they became proud; then they forgot me.' God gets a scrap or two only because we feel guilty for giving Him nothing.  A mumbled 3 minute prayer at the end of the day, when we are already asleep.  Two crumpled-up dollar bills thrown as an after thought in the church's fund for the poor.  Fetch, God!"

Wow.  Were you struck and humbled by this as much as I was? How true this is.  I dont think that we do this intentionally, atleast not all of us, but I think we get so caught up in the busyness of our lives that we sit down at the end of the day and realize, "Oh ya, God, I forgot about you today....Here's a thought or prayer or donation for You. Thanks!" 

     - " Leftovers are not merely inadequate; from God's point of view (and lest we forget, He is the only one that matters) , they're evil. Let's stop calling it "a busy schedule" or "bills" or "forgetfulness". It's called evil. "

It takes a renewing of the mind from thinking consistently earthbound to thinking and living in light of eternity. The enemy is sneaky and throws whatever he can into our path to keep us forgetting to remember who we serve.  If he can get us to serve money, or career, or family, or success, then he's done his job of turning our eyes from Jesus and turning our eyes to him. Remember that we are only on earth on a day pass.  This is not our home and we were never meant to try and make it as such. We as Christians are in desperate need of a paradigm shift.

Point blank, NOTHING should be more important to us than our relationship with God.  He is not an added element to our lives... He should be the main element in our lives.  He should not be an after thought, but an only thought.

Let's make a plan to quit serving our Majestic Creator a ziplocked bag full of frostbitten faithfulness.  It's time to give Him our first fruits and not our brown bananas.

Are you fit for the manure pile?

In chapter 4, Mr. Chan gives a profile of what the lukewarm Christian looks like.  Many of the signs and symptoms I was familiar with, but I'll be honest in saying that a few hit a little harder than they should have in some cases.

He begins the chapter by talking about the message of Christ and how that message can either fall into good soil or bad.  He admonishses the reader to not assume the title of "Good soil", and laments that in his belief, most current day Christians are not the good soil, but instead are the thorny soil that chokes the seed of the message out.  The thorns of our soil are anything that distracts us from being 100% sold out to God....be it career, money, family, success, etc. We attempt to take stock of our soil's quality and call it "good enough" and call ourself "godly enough", but in God's economy enough is never enough....we need to joyfully be giving Him more than enough, our ALL. Think of those in NT scripture who tried to follow Christ in the "I will give this up and follow You, Lord, but first I need to..." kind of way.  Christ flat out told them that their "buts" were not of the same caliber of importance as was following Him.  This used to catch me off guard and make me think "Well, who did He think He was?".....Oh, wait, that's right... HE'S THE SON OF GOD. Why shouldnt He be considered as more important and worth following than our fleeting things here on earth. Heart check for sure!

The rest of the chapter is spent pointing out the signs of luke warmness.  I would love to know, those of you who are reading this with me, what sign most stuck out to you or gave you a heart check?

What is keeping us from living out a life of red hot dedication to God?  Why do we insist on being luke warm, with one foot in the world and one foot in eternal striving? The Bible clearly states that we can not be fence sitters and that we will be spit out of God's mouth if we are luke warm and tasteless.  He would rather we be completely hot or completely cold but not meandering somewhere in the middle. It's time to wake up and LIVE FOR SOMETHING!

Until we meet again, In HIS crazy love,

Ash

Meet My Sister Ashlee!

This is my sister Ashlee. She is 24 years old and lives in the St. Louis area. She has an amazing heart and a wonderful outgoing personality. God has blessed her with many wonderful talents from singing and acting to being very creative and artsy. She has a passion to serve God and currently works as a counselor to troubled young women. She is currently serving as the Event Chair for her ministry's annual 5K as well.

In her free time, Ashlee enjoys spending time with friends (you'll often find her at local coffee shops reviewing for her local cafe blog), working out, spending time outdoors, cooking, baking, and exploring all that the St. Louis area has to offer. She enjoys music (of all types), movies, and theatre. She also has a passion for travel and would love to meet a man who shares in this and would accompany her in world traveling adventures.

Ashlee graduated Magna Cum Laude in May 2010 from Missouri Baptist University with a double major in Worship Arts and Church Leadership. We were super proud of her accomplishments. She interned for 6 months as a direct of worship for a church in the inner city and then for another 6 months in Community Relations for a non-profit before excepting the position where she is currently employed.

Ashlee is part of a warm, loving, christian family.  She was raised as a pastor's kid and continues to have a deep love for the Lord.  We are a close knit family and enjoy spending time together.  She has two older siblings.  Myself, her sister, and a brother who is married with five children.  Ashlee enjoys spending time with her four nephews playing games, wrestling, and whatever else they come up with for her.  She also enjoys cuddling and loving on her new niece, who was born in December of 2010.

My sister is my best friend!  I absolutely love every moment we spend together.  No matter what we do, there is bound to be plenty of laughs and memories made. God truly blessed my life when He gave her to us.

Ashlee loves life and has a beautiful spirit within her.  She has a heart of gold to offer to that special someone.  If you think you might like to get to know my sister better, please leave a comment and I will make sure she gets back to you!

Snowed in with Francis Chan

As I sit surrounded by 6" of snow, unable to leave my house, I couldnt think of any better way to spend my day of incapacity than to soak in some more Crazy Love.

Chapter 3 is entitled "Crazy Love" and it begins Mr. Chan's dig into our perception of God's love vs. the reality of God's love. I appreciated his raw and real look at this topic and his willingess to admit his own downfalls in his pursuit for understanding of God's love.  At one point he admits questioning God's love and doubting His provision for him.  How often do we do the same?  Have you ever been in a rough season of life, where circumstances seem insurmountable, and hope seems bleak? Have you ever felt like Job?  In the midst of trial we often are quick to ask "Where are you, God?!  Don't you love me?  If you loved me then why would you be putting me through this?"  Instead of looking at the situation as an opportunity to draw nearer TO God, we use the situation as a reason to withdrawl FROM God. It's awful, but its honest.

Now think about how you act when you love someone. Not just any someone, but someone who makes your world go round and makes your heart skip a beat.  Do you enjoy spending time with this person?  And why do you spend time with this person?  Is it out of a sense of "responsibility" or guilt, or do we spend time with this person simply out of our desire to know them better and be in their presence?  Mr. Chan points out how we as Christians begrudgingly approach our time with God.  He points out that, especially in the beginning of our walk, we see time with God as our Holy chore and that if we fail to do it, we will lose brownie points with God.  Our approach needs to change from a guilt ridden servitude to an affection driven attitude.  I'm not trying to get all "touchy-feely-new agey" on you.  I actually quite despise that approach but I can't help but agree with Mr. Chan that God does not want our "dutiful reverence" but our "heart rendered reverence".
                      - "This is how God longs for us to respond to His extravagant, unending love: not with cursory
                          quiet time plagued by guilt, but with true love expressed through our lives."

How would applying this perception change affect your spiritual walk?

Have you ever considered that you are WANTED by God?  You are His precious creation, and while He doesnt NEED you, He WANTS you.   He wants to commune with you, to bless you, to guide you.  If He didnt want you then why would He have sent His Son to die for you?  He knew us before we existed and He brought us into being. "For by Him and through Him and to Him are all things."  "By His hand all things were created and have their being" "For God so loved the world (YOU) that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosever (YOU) that believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life."  He LOVES you.  Get that into your head and heart and HOLD ONTO IT.

                        - "The wildest part is Jesus doesnt have to love us. His being is utterly complete and perfect,
                            apart from humanity. He doesn't need me or you. Yet He wants us, chooses us, even
                            considers us His inheritance. The greatest knowledge we can ever have it knowing God
                            treasures us."

Take some time and let that sink into your soul.



Now, consider this shuddering fact:

                         -" The irony is that while God doesn't need us but still wants us, we desperately need God
                             but don't really want Him most of the time."

Remember how I said his approach in this chapter was fairly raw?  I wasn't kidding.  It's not pretty, but its honest.  There are times when we have to try really hard to "want" God, but thank HIM that our salvation is not based on what we do or not do, how we feel or not feel.  It hurts my heart to be able to admit that I've had these seasons but it spurs me on to love God in a great way than before.  I want to love Him more today than I did yesterday but less today than I will tomorrow.  I want to consistently be building my love for the ONE who loves me despite my heart's downfalls.

Finally, just when you thought you got out of chapter 3 unscathed, Mr. Chan sends a killer punch to the gut with this question: "Do you love this God who is everything , or do you just love everything He gives you?"
I have been saddened and sickened by how much our Christian culture has turned into a bunch of greedy, "What can God do for ME?", blessing hungry, shallow-end dwellers.  There's no more depth to many of the churches than there is in a kiddy pool.  I recently sat through the conference of a major evangelical preacher who lead thousands of people to believe that 2011 was their "year for blessing" and that if they just "believed" enough, that God was going to drop whatever their hearts yearned for on their doorsteps with no devotion required in return.  He asked them to find their hope in this. WOW, that's dangerous.  Since when has it been ok to put conditions on God?  What happens when that woman who prays for her caner ridden family member to be healed only to be horrified when that prayer isnt answered?  Meet the jaded, one time Christian who now resents God. The modern day church has exchanged the truth of scripture for the soul-searching self- help theology that has turned so many into watered down, snake oil purchasers.  Harsh, I know. Sad, but true.

Not that this will ever happen, but what if God stopped blessing His children....Would you still love Him?
If He refused to pay off your mortgage, provide you with a new car, restore your broken relationship, or cure your illness, would you still devote your love and life to Him?  There's nothing we have that we could ever give to God to earn His love but He pours His love on us anyway....so why is it that we think that God needs to offer US HIS best in order to prove Himself worthy of OUR love? (P.s.  He already has....His SON).

I hope that you all are enjoying this journey through His Crazy Love and are becoming as renewed in your thought processes towards it as I am..

-Ash

You may not finish this blog post...

Chapter 2 of Crazy Love is entitled "You may not finish this chapter".  In this chapter Mr. Chan reminds us of how insignificant (in the scope of the universe) and fleeting our lives really are.  We spend so much time and effort on making ourselves the stars of our own movie that we often leave God out.  We often spend so much time "doing" for God that we neglect "being" with God...we neglect his commands and statutes because we somehow think that we are exempt because of our good deeds.  Good deeds dont get us into Heaven nor do they prove anything to God.  We are saved by grace through faith, and NOT by works, so that no man can boast.  Should we do things as an expression of our love for God? Yes.  Should we do things in an attempt to earn favor with God at the expense of our relationship with God? No.

This chapter really did hit me like a wrecking ball to the gut.  How often do we really consider the fragility of our time here on earth?  Are we making each day a day that glorifies Him?  I dont believe that we should walk around with our mortal "death watch" time pieces on our wrists, fretting about what COULD happen during a day that could possibly wipe us out.  But I do believe that it is important to live our lives in the face of eternity.  Paul said "To live is Christ and to die is gain."  If we live or die, either way, we ultimately win.  If we live we are granted more time on earth to proclaim the love of Christ to the nations and if we die we are granted an eternity with our One True Love.  How does it get any better than that?

Secondly,I was convicted by Mr. Chan's perspective on worry and stress.  I'm blessed to say that I've long put my worry days behind me and learned that trusting in God, letting Him have control, and letting HIS will be done puts me in the peaceful passenger seat...and I'm more than ok with this.  I do, however, have a hard time with stress.  I often take too much on myself, balance too many plates, and lack the ability to consistently deligate to alleviate the issue.  Am I the only one? "Both worry and stress wreak of arrogance." OUCH! Mind stepping on my pride abit more, Mr. Chan?  But think about it... it's true!  When we worry or stress out, we are saying that whatever the issue or circumstance, its too big for God to handle and we can take it ourselves. Right, like the God of the universe couldnt handle a final exam, or scrapping the money together to pay a car payment, or get to work on time despite the parking lot that 270 can be at 7:00am?OUR GOD IS INFINITELY MORE CAPABLE AND ABLE THEN WE WILL EVER BE. NOTHING IS TOO BIG FOR OUR GOD. Got it? Let that sink in for a moment.  I think it's time that we as Christians join hands and fight against our own fleshly arrogance that says we are all sufficient and put God back on the throne of our lives.  Let's just say I'm going to be much more aware of my stress levels after reading this chapter.

I did, by His grace, finish the chapter and now feel as though He has given me the gift of another moment to praise Him. I may not have this moment tomorrow or the next day, but I have it now and will bask in His love and marvel at His mercy for it.

Life is not about us. Life does not revolve around us.  Life is a gift to us from God and what we do with that life is our gift back to Him. What are YOU going to do with this gift?



One final note as a response to this video..
My father was an incredible man of faith who ministered to so many during his time on earth.  No matter what condition he was in, he always took the time to show God's love and be the hands and feet of his Ceator.  At my father's memorial service (life celebration) the house was packed and so many individuals came forward to speak about how my father's life had impacted theirs...lives he didnt even know he had touched.  My father often doubted if what he was doing ever made a difference but on the day that he breathed his last and woke up at the gates of Eternity, I am assured that all doubt was stripped away when he heard the Father say "Well done my good and faithful servant."

What will people say about you when you're gone?  What will people say about your faith when you're gone? Food for thought.

-Ash

A new journey in Awe

A few weeks ago I had a humbling conversation with a friend who is half a world away and it was during this conversation, seeing his passion for his faith, that I was convicted about my own state of passion for mine.  I have been a Christian my entire life.  I was baptised when I was 6 but I was born into a pastor's home and basically came out of the womb loving Jesus. The Christian bubble has been my safety net as long as I can remember but this same safety net has also proved to be my undoing at times as well.  I have seen some of the worst attrocities come from those who call themselves "Christians" and claim to love God but their ways are far from Him. It could be very easy to become jaded and turn away from God all together simply because of his followers but I've always known that my God is not what these seemingly irreverant "Christians" embody.  In the 18 years that I have been a born again believer I have experienced the inexpressable, painful, beautiful, awe inspiring love of a Maker that I dont even begin to deserve. I have ridden the waves of faith that wax and wane between intense devotion to perplexed despondency.  I have witnessed the Lord of Heaven and earth giving and taking away.  I have been rendered to brokenness on my knees before Him, with no choice but to praise Him, trust Him, love Him. But have I truly loved Him with wreckless abandon as we are called to do? What does it mean to love the One who IS love?

In an effort to better understand this concept and to put a flame to the pilot light of my faith stove, I decided to take on the challenge of reading "Crazy Love" by Francis Chan. I have heard so much about this book and it's ability to shed new light on an ancient concept but had never read it myself. I was excited to find that Mr. Chan created videos to go along with the written journey so as to further challenge his readers to consider the concepts that he so painstakingly presents.

He makes the point that we are not to journey through this life alone and that the journey of God's love should be approached in a relational way with other believers.  I would love to have a huge group of us reading this and interacting together but I am realistic about the fact that we are all in different parts of our journeys and you may not be reading this while I am. However, I have decided to journal my journey through this book and welcome those of you who have read it (or even if you havent!) to interact with the concepts, revelations, heart renderings, and moments of awe of our Majestic Father that will inevitably emerge during this time.

I will also be posting the videos that go with each chapter, which I urge you to take the time to watch, even if you're not currently reading the book.

Strap yourselves in. Keep all limbs inside the vehicle at all times. Here we go!

Chapter 1: Stop Praying.
Say what?! Hold on, does this NOT go against everything we've ever been told about prayer? Mr. Chan, pardon me, but what are you smoking? Just kidding.  There is good reason for this command. How often do we as Christians run to God in prayer only when the walls are crumbling around us, begging for resolve or blessing, or healing, or relief? How often do we really consider the enormity of the One who we bring our requests to?

     -"Men are never duly touched and impressed with conviction of their insignificance, until they have contrasted themselves with the majesty of God."

Sit and soak in that for a moment. R.C. Sproul, take us away!  Does God answer prayers? Yes. Does God care about the details of our lives? Yes. But are we only concerned with God in respect to how He is concerned with us? The answer is likely yes. The real question is, what do WE think about God? Or for that matter, do we even think about God?  Lately my core has been shaken by the amount of professing Christians whose main focus is what God can DO for them.  Sure, they have to have faith that He WILL bless them but according to them, this believing faith is all that is required, no matter what the request.  Want to win the lottery? Believe hard enough and God will bless you.  Want to be cured from cancer? Pray and believe...and if you believe hard enough, God will certainly heal you. WOW. Is that what our instant-gratification society has reduced the God of the UNIVERSE to? Does this worry anyone else?!

The point of this first chapter is to shake up your preconceived ideas and approaches to God and make you stop and stand in awe of who HE really is.  While we cannot even begin to understand all of the intricacies of His entity, He does give us wonderful insights that surround us every day....do you see them?



     -"It is sobering to realize that this is the same God who is holy and eternal, the Maker of the billions of galaxies and thousands of tree species in the rainforest. This is the Gd who takes the time to know all the little details about each of us. He does not have to know us so well, but He chooses to." - F.Chan

The following is another video that encompasses the message of this chapter.  While it is longer, it is not to be overlooked.  Take a few moments and really let the message you've probably heard all of your life.  Think about His grace.  Think about His mercy.



"He is jealous for me. Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree bending beneath the weight of His love and mercy.  All of a sudden I am unaware of afflictions eclipsed by glory and I realize just how BEAUTIFUL You are and how great Your affections are for me." - David Crowder "How He Loves"